Easily Amused

My cat is sleeping on the bed, oblivious to the thunderstorm brewing outside. His curled up position makes him look like a baby seal, so chubby and cute. But I bet baby seals don’t whine as much as he does (he whines about 179 times a day).

The coffee on my desk is 5 hours old and tastes like what a 5-hour-old coffee should taste like – bitter, with resentment for a glory lost.

I have a handful of pistachio shells on a piece of recycled paper. I wondered what they could be reused for. Googling for an answer, I found “helmets for snails“. LOL :)

PS: Busy week for me, yay for weekends!

Zero or Max?

I passed by two large posters within steps of each other on my way home. The first one was that of Coke Zero, the second, Pepsi Max. I find it interesting how each company decides to market these similar products using different angles. One emphasises on the drink’s maximum taste (sans sugar), the other on the lack of calories (while retaining its original flavour):

Pepsi Max — Maximum Taste, No Sugar vs Coca-Calo Zero — Real Coke Taste, Zero Calories 

It could well be Pepsi None or Coke Full. Maybe even “Pepsi No!!!” or “Coke Real?”. I amuse myself with silly little thoughts sometimes.

Which do you prefer?

Do You Bite or Lick?

I lick my ice-cream, except when it’s chocolate-dipped, in which case, I bite the coating off first and then proceed with the licking. :)

Have a good Sunday (or a good sundae?)!

Be Careful What You Wish For!
Of Losing Weight and Wishing Well

Dear Secret Law of the Universe,

When I weighed myself this morning I found that I’m nearly 3 pounds more what I weighed in January. What happened? Was it the mindless snacking? Not enough of exercise? Water retention? All the above? I was mildly shocked but instead of planning to exercise more I decided that the best method to lose that extra weight was… to wish for the extra pounds to melt away. Not only that, I asked the powers of the secret law of the universe to reduce my weight by tonight.

At about 6pm, I had a funny feeling in my stomach and at 8pm I started having a bout of explosive diarrhoea that lasted for nearly 3 hours.

While groaning in pain in the the bathroom, I actually made time to appreciate your wicked sense of humour. Yes, I asked for this, yes, you granted my wish, and yes, you did it before the end of the day. When I weighed myself again just before the stroke of midnight, I was indeed 3 pounds lesser than I was in the morning. Very well done.

If you don’t mind, please automatically include the following addendum to all the wishes I’ve made and will make in the future:

1. No one is hurt — physically, mentally, spiritually or any other means possible– in the process of granting the wishes (and that includes me!);
2. The wishes are granted through means that are legally-, morally-, environmentally-, ethically-correct;

In return, I will do my best to:

1. remember to be grateful for all the wishes granted (lest I forget, I’d appreciate it if I’m reminded gently) and
2. have patience for the wishes that will be granted — I’m sure you’ve not forgotten my Macbook Air wish in January ;)

For that, I’d like to thank you for today’s lesson: be careful what you wish for — it might get your bum burned.

Gratefully yours.

Tomorrow, I’m going for a 2km run! :)

Maybe I Should Go Bananas?

On a box of Post Banana Nut Crunch cereal I was eating:

We should all aspire to live like bananas. They are on permanent vacation, living in lush, tropical rainforests.

I didn’t know bananas lead such enviable lives!

A Conversation with An Unlikely “Friend”

I used to be so afraid of failing. But why did I fear failure so much? Was it because we were strangers?

Failure: Hi, I’m the guy better know as Failure. My real name is Hard Lesson. People fear me because they choose to see me in negative light. I’m just part of everyone’s life journey, like Success. Now, that guy’s something. He’s got everyone pining for his company. What many people don’t know is that you usually need to be my acquaintance first before you can be his friend. I’ll always have something that you could take with you till you’re ready to meet him. It’s called Wisdom.

Me: Well this is me saying hi to you, Mr. Failure. I guess you’re not too bad. A bit harsh sometimes, but now that I know you better, you don’t seem as frightening as I imagined. But that doesn’t mean I have to like you. No, if I stick with you too long, I’ll be welcoming Depression.

F: Yeah, she tends to come without warning. We can still be friends right?

M: Er.. Can I ask you something? Why are you spelt in LOLcat? And why do you have such puny legs?

F: Actually I’m web 2.0 and secondly…it givs u the lulz?
Hmmm…you know what, I don’t really like you that much either. You ask too many questions. And you always find a need to validate my existence. I prefer the quieter, loser types. They just accept me as I am. Plus your types are a little, you know…

M: My type?

F: You sound like you have a quite a bit of Crazy in you.

M: Eh? Why’s that?

F: Well.. for a start you are having this conversation with me…

I’ve had more than few visits from this little guy over the years. The good thing to know is that once he is with you, the only other way to go is up. :)